A Reflection

A J-School story…


These past 16 months have been HARD.

A roller coaster of emotions. Should I drop out, should I stay, am I built for this, do I even want to do journalism?

I questioned myself every single day. Not only did I wonder if the field was for me, but I wondered if I was mentally strong enough to endure what I would have to go through. Was I smart enough to compete against these talent journalists who surrounded me?

I came into this school with some experience. I didn’t think I had a lot of experience, I mean come on. I had a Bachelor’s in Journalism, I’ve written in my school newspaper and I was the editor of an online magazine. That’s not a lot. But, a lot of my colleagues hadn’t taken a stab at journalism before coming to this school. So I had an advantage.

I’ve grown a lot since I first stepped on this campus. I’m shy. My friends don’t agree, but they’re dummies because when I first met each of them I was shy, but that’s besides the point. I used to sit in the corner of the newsroom on my laptop and do my work, text my girlfriend or watch YouTube.

Now, I’m in the center back of the newsroom, laughing it up with my colleagues, doing my work, texting my girlfriend and watching YouTube.

They used to try to get me to come to social events and I would decline. 1. because I was a young one and what could I possibly bring to the table 2. I wanted to go home and spend time with my family and go on FaceTime. Now, I realize I AM THE TABLE (LOL) and spending more time with them would open my eyes, my horizons, and help me grow.

I used to stay away from government policy, politics, etc. I usually don’t like to look at those things until years later That’s why I was a History major for two years in undergrad. But, being a part of the Urban Concentration turned everything around for me. Now, I long for the conversations that my colleagues and I have. We have rich conversations about NYC politics, American politics and even international politics. It’s super important to be well informed, and though I might not talk about these things in everyday conversations everyday, I AM well informed.

My studies here have actually taught me what I want to do in my life. I know that I don’t want to go into journalism as a career, but I do want to help people. Going to those community council meetings once a month and hearing the stories of people in the Chelsea community and telling their stories is what makes me happy. Having people come up to me and say they’ve read my story and they’re happy I got the word out about a certain issue in their community, makes me happy.

Journalism has set me up with a ton of resources. I know people from every field. I can reach out to whoever I want, whenever I want for a coffee, a quick question or an interview and I will have an answer.

This experience has taught me a lot. I now know that I am enough. Even though I am young, I am just as qualified as my colleagues. I am built for this and anything that I put my mind to. I have a purpose.

I’ve found my purpose and my calling, which I MIGHT share with you all in a next post, but for now I’ll keep you all guessing.


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